You sit here considering advice that will potentially determine your whole life.

I’m just six weeks old and you begin to think a termination is the only option as they tell you it’s not too late, but how can you let someone else decide your fate?

They tell you I’m numb to the pain and in time you’ll recover and learn from this mistake, but mummy I don’t want to see you grieve again. I hear you cry at night when the pressure on your mind weighs to tight and you feel you have no one to turn to, although I am young I feel you and I know you feel me. I feel your pain, your guilt, your shame but mummy you are not to blame.

He told you words you so longed to hear to fill a space of yearning love in your heart that just wasn’t there. You were too young to understand that they had no purpose for you but to use you and abuse you. They did nothing but fool you. You were only 15 when he told you to close your eyes as he went between your thighs .You trusted him and he hurt you, but mummy I could never hurt you.

Although I am far from what you have planned I promise I will be more than what you could ever dream of. I want nothing but to make you happy, for us to be a family for you to feel no more of the cold feeling of pain as I shall cast it out in the rain I will give you something to fight for … just mummy please hear me!

I want to live.

Please, just let me live.

About haringeyunchained

Haringey Unchained is a collective of students aiming to show case the creative talent of Haringey Sixth Form College in Tottenham, London. We think that through the promotion of our creative thoughts, we can educate our community, bringing to the foreground the critical and creative consciousness of a vibrant school in a deprived part of London. We are endeavouring to provide this blog as a platform for our community, giving the space to those whose work otherwise might not be seen or read. Being that the cuffs are off, we are able to express through our photography, art, short fiction and poetry, what’s really on our minds. We are free.

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s